What does self-control mean to you? Is it being calm when you’re angry or is it the ability to resist temptation?
The Bible refers to a person who lacks self-control as “like a city broken into and left without walls” (Proverbs 25:28). What a description! This means you’ll be vulnerable and heading towards destruction because of a lack of self-discipline.
Someone without self-control is often swayed by their impulses and desires which leads to irresponsible actions. Later in this post, I’ll give a few examples of a lack of self-control.
A main one that many of us struggle with is food. The urge to always be eating when our stomach is filled. Yes, it looks harmless until you find yourself searching your kitchen at night for something to eat. Over time, it starts to take a toll on our physical health. This may include weight gain and lower energy levels.
Self-control is the virtue that enables us to resist temptation, make wise choices, and abide by God’s will.
What does the bible say about Self-control?
First, let’s talk about what self-control is. Having self-control means having complete command over oneself, being able to resist temptations, and managing one’s feelings, wants, and urges.
Galatians 5:22-23 lists self-control as one of the fruits of the spirit. The Bible encourages us to exercise self-control in various aspects of our life including thoughts, actions, and speech.
There is a reason why God warned us about this topic. Relationships, careers, health, and future are destroyed because we fail to follow God’s way of living.
What is the secret to having self-control?
I wish I knew this sooner. Years ago I learned that if I can gain mastery over my thoughts and emotions – the battle is already won.
2 Corinthians 10:3-5 (NIV):
“For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
Before anything comes to manifestation, it first starts in our thoughts. So before that thought materializes, you need to get a hold of it and cast it down. It’s the same with any kind of lust – you sense the urge for something initially. In that early stage, you start praying against that imagination or thought.
Passively, we ignore these kinds of feelings because we think that is who we are. You say, “That is just who I am” but in retrospect, that is not the image of Christ. Or we give ourselves excuses to make ourselves feel better. Once you start making excuses, you’ll have difficulty controlling yourself.
6 Characters Who Show Self-Control In The Bible
Naturally, our first thought of lack of self-control would be overeating, impulse buying, substance abuse, anger outbursts, and engaging in risky behaviors. But does the Bible have any examples of these? What can we learn from the Word of God about self-control?
In the Word of God, we see many who were tempted but did not give in. We are going to look at a few today:
- Joseph’s Refusal: In Genesis 39, Joseph displays self-control when he rejects the advances of Potiphar’s wife, even though she persistently tries to seduce him. Joseph deeply values his integrity and unwavering devotion to God.
- Daniel’s Dietary Discipline: In Daniel 1, Daniel and his friends chose to eat only vegetables and water instead of the king’s food and wine to follow God’s dietary laws.
- David Spares Saul’s Life: In 1 Samuel 24, David consistently shows self-control by not harming King Saul, even when he had chances to do so. Despite Saul’s jealousy and attempts to kill him, David chooses to show respect and leaves judgment to God, acknowledging Saul’s position as king.
- Jesus’ Temptation: In Matthew 4:1-11, Jesus refused the temptations of Satan in the wilderness. Even though he was hungry and weakened, Jesus stayed strong in his dedication to God’s will and did not give in to the temptations.
- Paul’s Discipline: In 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, the apostle Paul compares self-control to an athlete’s training. He talks about disciplining his body and keeping it in check to avoid being disqualified from the spiritual race.
- Timothy’s Example: In 2 Timothy 1:7, Paul wrote to Timothy reminding him that God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power, love, and self-discipline (some translation says sound mind).
6 Examples of Characters Who Lack Self-Control To Learn From
Here are examples of those in the word of God who didn’t have self-control and paid dearly for it:
- Adam and Eve’s Disobedience: In Genesis 3, Adam and Eve made a mistake when they ate the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden. Even though God told them not to eat from the Tree of Knowledge of good and evil, they couldn’t resist the temptation. This choice ultimately led to the downfall of humanity.
- Cain’s Jealousy and Murder: In Genesis 4, Cain struggles with controlling his emotions when he becomes jealous of his brother Abel’s relationship with God. Instead of managing his feelings, Cain allows his anger and jealousy to consume him. This led to a tragic outcome of him taking his brother’s life.
- Lot’s Wife Looking Back: In Genesis 19, Lot and his family had to escape from the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. The angel told them not to look back, but Lot’s wife couldn’t resist. Because she disobeyed, she was turned into a pillar of salt.
- Samson’s Lust: Judges 16, Samson shows his struggles with self-control. Despite being aware of Delilah’s intentions to betray him, he still had an affair with her. This eventually results in his capture by the Philistines.
- King Saul’s Impatience: In 1 Samuel 13, King Saul made a burnt offering to God without waiting for the prophet Samuel, as he was told. Due to his impatience and disobedience, God ended up rejecting him as king.
- Peter’s Denial: In Matthew 26:69-75, During Jesus’ trial, Peter, despite previously stating his loyalty, denies knowing Jesus three times due to fear. He allowed his feelings of fear to overpower his loyalty to Jesus.
The Word of God in 1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us that no temptation will ever overtake us that isn’t common to men. But God is faithful and he will not let us be tempted beyond our ability. It doesn’t stop there! In addition, he will provide a way of escape that we may be able to endure.
Meditate on that and don’t feel discouraged!
16 Bible Verses on Self-Control
Proverbs 25:28 (NIV)
“Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.”
Just as a city needs strong walls to defend itself, a person needs self-control to protect themselves. You need to be able to rule over your spirit as this is a way to protect you from giving in to temptations.
If there is an area in your life that you are not strong in, start setting boundaries. Don’t allow that lust to lead to adultery etc.
Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV)
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things, there is no law.”
Do you know what is more powerful than the work of the flesh? The fruit of the spirit is LOVE. And this is a sign of the Holy Spirit working in you. Here we see the characteristics of the fruit of the spirit.
And guess what? Self-control is one! Remember that whenever you find yourself not acting in Love then you need to re-evaluate yourself.
1 Corinthians 7:5 (NIV)
“Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”
This scripture is referring to married couples about not depriving each other of physical intimacy. Unless it is mutually agreed upon. Depriving one another can open the door to Satan to tempt you. Just a precaution!
Proverbs 16:32 (NIV)
“Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.”
The Bible tells us that there is someone better than a warrior who can defeat an entire army. They are patient and slow to anger. If you can control your emotions then you’ll be stronger than someone who can take over a city.
I want to be that person!
Romans 12:1-2 (NIV)
“Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Resisting the temptations of the flesh and renewing our minds to God’s will is an act of worship. When we are transformed by the Word on the inside, it starts showing on the outside.
It’s impossible to give ourselves to God as a living sacrifice if we don’t know God’s will. So, let us surrender to God and allow His Word to guide our actions and thoughts.
Colossians 3:5 (NIV)
“Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.”
The fact we are told to denounce these sinful behaviors means that it is possible to be tempted by them. But if we exercise self-control we can resist these temptations and live according to God’s word.
James 1:19-20 (NIV)
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.”
Everyone can learn from this passage of scripture. The secret to being slow to anger is first to listen and then speak. By being attentive listeners, we can understand better and avoid unnecessary conflicts.
Many times when we are angry we don’t listen to what the other person is saying and are more focused on our agenda.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 (NIV)
“But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.”
We are already seeing these attributes in our world today. This passage reminds us to stay alert and guard ourselves against these negative behaviors. Instead, let’s work toward having the fruit of the spirit and live in a way that pleases God.
Romans 6:12-14 (NIV)
“Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness. For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace.”
It is difficult for sin to be master over you when you’re under the law of grace. We are instructed to offer ourselves to God as an instrument of righteousness. But how? By resisting temptations of sin, living a life of holiness, and being obedient to God.
Galatians 5:19-21 (NIV)
“The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.”
Paul warns about practices that will prevent us from inheriting the kingdom of God. The following verses went on to tell us to exhibit the fruit of the spirit instead.
2 Peter 2:19 (NIV)
“They promise them freedom, while they themselves are slaves of depravity—for ‘people are slaves to whatever has mastered them.'”
You will never find freedom in the flesh. And the scriptures emphasize that people are slaves to whatever controls them. Whether it be sinful desires and lust or corrupt thinking. Let this encourage you to that freedom can only be found in Jesus Christ!
Ephesians 4:22-24 (NIV)
“You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.”
Our old self is corrupted by deceitful desires. Paul instructs believers to put off their old selves and embrace their new identity in Christ Jesus. For us to be able to do this, we have to intentionally align our thoughts, attitudes, and actions to reflect who we are in Christ Jesus.
Titus 2:11-12 (NIV)
“For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in this present age.”
The grace of God brings salvation and enables us to live an upright life. To denounce all worldly passions that will lead us astray. God’s grace will help you to overcome sin whenever you feel tempted.
Titus 1:8 (NIV)
“Rather, he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined.”
Here we instructed as believers and leaders in the church we must have self-control. There is a way we must act to set a positive example for others to follow.
How we act or carry ourselves can either pull or push people away from the Gospel.
1 Peter 4:7 (NIV)
“The end of all things is near. Therefore be alert and of sober mind so that you may pray.”
Let’s end with one of my favorite scriptures. Paul is encouraging all believers to be disciplined and alert. To pray always without ceasing so that we don’t lose focus.
Conclusion
Whenever you feel tempted, study the bible on self-control and meditate on these verses. Self-control isn’t about being perfect or that you’ll never have temptations. It’s about applying the word of God and casting down every imagination that isn’t in alignment with God’s word.
It doesn’t matter what you’re struggling with, God’s word can deliver you. Remember there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus!
Also, check out these motivational scriptures to help you whenever you feel discouraged.
I pray that this article helps you on your Christian journey.
